I am a half African American and half Puerto Rican mother. My child is pale with gray eyes and brown hair. I often have people stare at me as if I’ve stolen my own baby! There will be many situations where people will be rude. I just try to prepare my child for it the best I can. As long as you love your child, no one’s comments will matter. My mother was what they call a “white” Puerto Rican and growing up I experienced many similar situations. However, I think that the love I experienced in my household outweighed any hate I experienced outside of it. My husband is white and I have come to be a very diverse woman because of my parents’ teachings. We openly talked about so many racial issues as well as spiritual issues. She obviously understands she must teach her daughter. I think she just didn’t want to do it in a public place. Best wishes.

I’m not sure about the environment in which she is being raised; it is hard to know. I will say this - it is not limited to white folk. My husband and I brought sibling girls (3 and 6) home from Ethiopia 4 months ago and I am disturbed by some of the girls’ thoughts and statements about skin color, including their own. We have work to do to repair some early environmental impact, spare others any pain, and restore/preserve the self esteem of these children.

Very recently, our 6 yo communicated that her birthmom told her that she would turn white when she came to America. Another Ethiopian-American woman on our airplane trip back from Ethiopia told her that in a couple of months (in America) her hair would straighten and her skin would lighten (like her daughter’s). The woman told both my husband and me (at different times) that she had told our daughter this as if it was a good thing. I was at a loss for a proper response and my goal was to just get home! I just said, “We think she’s perfect just as she is.”

Sorry for the long post - I love checking in on you all and the kids and find your blog a great resource!
Terri